walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
