how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I have already put on my inside pants.
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