I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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