I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
