Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I licked your asshole in confidence.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
