dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
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