Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
