So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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