He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
People in love make me want to vomit
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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