he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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