I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
