please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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