She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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