So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
