my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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