So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
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