Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
