it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Randomize
