I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Randomize
