I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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