I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize