Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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