Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
