Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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