Porn is love you can see.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
