Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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