what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Randomize
