She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
