I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
