no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
