whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
