Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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