Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I wish you could order shots online.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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