Don't you send me to vm
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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