turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
did i just pee glitter
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
