Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
