I murdered the dance floor call the cops
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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