Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
