just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
