Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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