North Korea, Best Korea!
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Randomize
