And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
