Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Randomize
