so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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