i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
