Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
