every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
