We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
