Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I hope mine doesn't look like that
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
