I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Randomize
