So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Randomize
